Unique experiences, insights, and perspectives of Alex Ansary

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Military Mind Control at the Mall

Oh God, someone pinch me.

Ouch! Didn't mean that literally.

Oh wow. How shall we begin this?

Sigh...deep breath.. Ok.

Don't ask my why I torture myself by going to the mall. Maybe I feel that I need more material for my show, or maybe I got issues and just wanna get pissed off for no reason. But for whatever reason, I decided an hour ago that Lloyd Center's food court was my destination. Hey, I'm a busy guy, kiss off.

The problem was sanely getting to my destination within that human cage called a mall. I walk in the mall and automatically adjust myself to this machine of an existence I just entered. With the sterile air and perfume smells all around me, all I could hope for is that the sheeple would remain physically be OUT OF MY WAY so I can get to where I'm going without catching some kind of STUPIDITY/ILLITERATE disease of the mind. Damn, I left my mask at home again.

Often in malls the bubbles, shiny objects, smells, music, and bouncing boobs is too much stimuli for one to handle, causing one to feel dizzy and nearly blind as the herd bumps into inanimate objects and each other. I begin to feel ill as my awareness of the mind control in the mall increases to the next level. Am I the only one here that can see?

On the first floor the Portland Police are talking with children, sitting at a table by the Old Navy clothing store handing out police badge stickers to the kiddies. Don't ask about the economy and who's crashing it. Don't ask why we live a police state and why the government is getting ready for martial law. That's just weird.

"I don't wanna fight man," I think to myself. I just wanna get to my destination. Oh god, why am I here? There are so many fat people here now in this mall, what is happening to their minds? What happened to their spirits? Am I the only one that sees the predator hiding behind the trees?

After taking a cell phone picture of the police just to make them nervous, I decide that I'm not looking for a fight. Hey, I'm a nice guy and I'm hungry. Back to the hunt this awkward urban jungle for the least toxic GMO contaminated food. MMM MMM good, they say. Watch out bouncing boobs at 10 clock, look away, look away grasshopper.

I walk carefully into the video game store making sure I don't accidentally slip on a pool of drool, for in this mall there plenty to drool over. Posters are everywhere proudly displaying future soldiers in high tech suits getting ready for some serious combat in a world war three scenario. A large man weighing over 300 lbs of fat leaves the store pushing his baby in a stroller?

I ask, "How was the mind control store today sir?"

Haha, no response, non expected!

After gobbling up whatever road kill I fed myself and hypocritically lecture a random girl on the dangers of GMO food buying the same slop as well, I decide it's time to depart from this fantasy wonderland.

And here she is. My future ex wife. Just kidding. Standing there with her young blond hair and Aryan blue eyes, shes asks,

"Hello sir, could we ask you some questions about what you think about these upcoming movies?"

Uh huh.

"Um, you don't want to talk to me," I say.

Her: "Yes I do."

Me: "No you don't."

Her: "I get paid to ask people about their opinion of these new Hollywood movies."

Me: "I know that. I got a question for you. Why do they call it... Hollywood?" (Hollywood is a magically wand from the holly tree that is being used to mind control the population according to Jordan Maxwell.)

Her: I don't Know.

Me: Exactly

I ended up ranting my head off about the violence and sexual perversion in movies and Hollywood and how that messes up the mind of susceptible children that don't know any better.

Her: "But it's always been that way, that's nothing new."

Me: "!!!!!!!!!!!" I'm outta here.

Her: "No wait. I need to make my money, let me show you some trailers and you can tell me what you think."

Me: "You already know what I'm gonna say lady. You got five minutes, lets go."

(Putting headset on, going over to laptop.)

to be continued later tonight....


Anonymous said...

Admit it - you know you wanted that hottie!!!

Bitesize coup said...

Hey Alex,

I too can't get my head around the controling comsumer nature here in the UK. Its hard to avoid talking about the latest big thing on mind controled bbc tv with people. People wont believe truth, but they will believe a warm fuzzy broadcast of high definition pixelated lies.

Have you seen the telegraphs comic strip operation blackjack to take place on 22nd june.

Take it easy


Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

OK OK, nice guest finally. That guy had it figured out. Surprised he continued to live with that knowledge so long, and still decides to do so!

But he was way off-base on the "neutron bomb" BS. You get that sort of effect, when you detonate a 60 megaton warhead - and no other way (that humans know). Of course, I could be wrong, and we have gravity-well "eggs" to take us to the moon and beyond... but I digress.

The problem isn't gunna be that the grid is down for 1 year, but rather the heavy metals circulating around in the atmosphere (due atom bomb). Be real, and quit pretending to live in some era where there's magical weapons that shut down all electronics, while we dance in harmony.

As I already stated, the demise of our race is the amazon clearcutting. In 50 years, when the amazon is gone, we are all DEAD.

You can, of course, censor this post - I EXPECT YOU TO.

THERE ARE WEAPONS TO DO THAT (what?) - they also involve much more sinister side-effects.